Lauryn McNair #24

Junior year has been a whirlwind and a desert (not really parallel I know) at the same time. Crazy and at times seemingly unmanageable, while also being boring and relatively anti-climatic. When looking back, I have a really bad habit of thinking it (whatever it is) was easier than it really was. Conveniently forgetting all the troubles that plagued my existence at the time. So I'm going to talk about all the mistakes I made to remind myself how much this summer break is needed. This year I got my first B in high school. Yes, I know how it sounds, boo hoo I have a 3.97 instead of a 4.0, big deal. But okay, I've worked my butt off for the 4.86 I have and this was the first year I could have a 5.0, and sadly did not get one. Admittedly, I acted like a huge baby for like a week and may've or may've not ripped up my report card in an act of sadness and honestly just to bother my mom. Getting B honestly took the pressure off of having a 4.0, and made me a little less psycho crazy about my grades. Other big mistake was thinking that I should work during my junior year of school. Like that was the dumbest thing I've ever done. Trying to juggle 5 AP classes, several clubs, and a job, not including a social life, is honestly more stress than it's worth. But I made it through with only one B, and money to fuel my CD/lip-gloss addiction so I'm not terribly disappointed in myself. Poor decisions and failed grades aside, I'm really bad at following through with things. As we speak I'm pushing off a project that I created and am trying to implement ,for reasons unbeknown to me. Because of this, I don't really do applications. I start them, freak out about them, push them aside, don't do them, and have anxiety about them for several months after them because I didn't do them. I didn't apply to GSP or GSA, both which I found really interesting and would have loved to do, but simply could not find the strength or time to complete the applications. But not to dwell too long on the bad things, I've actually accomplished stuff this year. I achieved the exact ACT score I wanted, I got into NHS, and I got accepted into a student congress type thing over the summer(which I filled out an application for!!). I've also gotten a lot better at not comparing myself to people, whether that be in looks, or grades, or writing, which is something I've been working. This post is reaching annoyingly long, so for next year I just want to get into UK with a full ride and be happy and debt free.